w t f ok

I’m soooooo annoyed with myself.

so you know how i went on a date last week and it wasn’t what i expected?

well. i’m still not fucking over it and I’m really annoyed at myself. there’s two people that have told me that they really like me, as in “go on a date with me” like. but i don’t really like them back. i don’t know. they’re really nice and they’re very cute. but i was sooo disgustingly infatuated with the bad date person and i still am lol. i keep hoping they look at my snapchats or idk i just want attention from them 😦

 

in relation to this, during the first conversation i had with my ex when they got out of jail (and i had told them that i just wanted to be friends), they were boasting about how many people had “liked” them on this online dating site and how they wanted someone to cuddle with. and i was like ????? why are you telling me this like why is this happening right now. I’m not even mad I’m just annoyed because we just broke up and also it feels really unfair and dumb that they moved on so quickly. especially because i was being stupid and waiting for them to get better for so long and it just didn’t happen until we fell out of love so. lol.

 

I invited one of the people that like me to go to an event with me on Monday (because the bad date person had told me about it) and i didn’t even call it a date until they called it a date and i was like ??? i don’t want to go alone but i also don’t want the bad date person to see me with a date because i want the bad date person to hang out with me again lol. I’m so pathetic i hate everything.

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3 thoughts on “w t f ok

    1. Right? I don’t even know. I’ve been feeling really insecure about my body lately. As a fat girl, it’s been hard to feel at peace with myself. And there was a point in time where I really did love myself. It’s becoming increasingly difficult. I just got over a breakup and I guess that this “bad date person” was the sort of thing that I was hoping would make me feel “wanted,” still. Though I know it’s silly, I just wanted that sort of from someone other than myself.

      1. Well, I would tell my own daughters that “BDP” obviously does *not* have the ability to give you what you want, or anything positive to offer you, so it would probably be a good idea to focus your energy elsewhere. You are precious in and of yourself and deserve a kindred that offers you what you need and desire! XOXOX

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