I am not coping

I pass by the place where my car accident happened nearly every day. The school I go to is one hour away from I live so I travel two hours to and from school, total.

I remember where it happened. Milepost 57.
I got into an accident because of a deer.
I try to not think about it. I’m trying to get over this. But every time I pass by the location or even get on that same highway, I tense up and get anxious. I have to talk to myself and constantly remind myself, “you are ok, Monica.
You are here. You are ok. You are doing good.”
Coincidentally, today when I passed by milepost 57, there was a deer. 
I had a horrible panic attack right in that moment. I screamed and I cried and then I screamed some more. 
It turns out, I am not doing ok. I am not coping. I am not ok.
Advertisements

2 thoughts on “I am not coping

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s