My partner is going out tonight and they haven’t done anything but I feel unnecessarily angry. If I were to be honest with myself, I would say that I am angry because I am jealous. I feel this way because it feels like they get to go out and have a good time but I’m stuck in my dorm room, alone, with no one to talk to. I would describe the feeling like as if you were watching your best friend get invited to a party while you’re also there or like when you see pictures of your friends at a party you weren’t invited to.
On one hand, you are happy for them because they went out and had a good time. But on the other hand, you can’t REALLY feel happy for them because you’re bitter and sad.
I am feeling that way.
I am alone.
I am lonely.
I am sad.
I am bitter.
I know that if I’m being honest, this is how I feel. This is why I am angry. But I can’t bear to even see them or talk to them.